Old love never dies ???

Posted on Posted in EN Blog

How complicated can be our path and life situations. Today with my wife-Amal- we are happy to return to the peace lost many years ago. And although it is not easy for me to write about it, the last few weeks have brought a lot of pain and learning to our family. At God’s will, we lost the baby with Amina, this also ended with the collapse of our family. I hope that the future may bring us closer to each other and we will be better prepared to cope with adversity that we face. And although at first it was very difficult for us to find themselves in this situation, today we try to see in this lesson and learn which is invaluable to us, because thanks to such experiences we become adults and aware of what is most important to our family.

The most valuable experience that opened our hearts and mind was aware of how much we love the children with Amal and how much we would like to be great carers and role models for my offspring. And when we honestly talked about people who would like to be able to start a family and because of various difficulties go through similar experiences. The truth is, that unlike women, men love differently. I myself many years ago loved a woman who is precisely in this situation, what enchanted me and confirmed me in the good choices of my wife, who can understand this great difference.

Raja, with whom I share more than a decade of memories and hopes and her heart delves into the love and humility of God, I hope she will bring maturity and responsibility into our family. Because time heals all wounds but also give you the opportunity to get closer to know the other person, and it is necessary to better understand ourselves. Although at first I guided by the envy and regret for common past, on the last Jumma – sermon caused my revelation and opened my heart to an unfair evaluation of my lusts and motives in our situation in which I was looking for an easy way and selfish motives, instead of reflecting on the true purpose and consequences of our choices.

Today Raja and I, we are far from each other and we hope in the near future to become a family and focus on her and on what we can bring to it. The first obligation of a Muslim is to protect himself. And although we know that on the Day of Judgment everyone will be responsible only for themselves, Amal and I, we try to support and protect from all that we encounter. Amal and Raja many years ago were friends, who knew of emotional commitment to me. And although initially our friendship was very joyful and full of emotion, life has separated us into two camps. We weren’t Muslims at the time and we could’t find a place for us in the surrounding community. We didn’t have enough knowledge and understanding of the world around us and we felt bad about the public opinion that seemed to be naturally correct, looking at most of the people around us and implied expectations of our families. As young people were guided by heart and did not pay attention to other. However, the pressure of the environment and time resulting from not understanding and the unknown foundation of our natural needs for acceptance resulted in the breakdown of this relationship.

Today, after years, the first time we had a sincere conversation about the past and the feelings which then gave us strength and guided our hearts.  Not without emotion, tears, screams or offended ambition. However, thanks to understanding and calm humility towards the Law and God we found a common language. Over a dozen years difference between Amina and Raja gives me hope for the right priorities in life and better understanding. A common goal for our whole family – the defense of truth and giving a good example of being humble and devoted to God for our children and families has become a weld that I hope will bring us closer and will help us to be patient, understanding and happy in facing everyday challenges.